Life Lessons.

So its been a minute since I have updated the world on the happenings in the Morris household. So I figured I would give that a shot tonight. The last month has been crazy busy for us. Making some pretty big life choices, getting Nic ready for AT, celebrating ten months of marriage, going through my last few weeks of classes leading up to recital, surviving all 4 insane Saturday rehearsals, sending Nic to AT, surviving two dress rehearsals and two shows, losing a friend that was very near to our family, making the drive back to PA, and spending a full week away from Nic with one more to go.

Thats been the last month of our lives in a nutshell.

Here's what I have learned from all of this.

1. Life is what you make of it. Sitting at the studio for 12 hours on a Saturday can either suck, or be full of memories that will last for a lifetime. Spending 14 hours straight inside the Harrison Opera House can be painful, or be an opportunity to share in the excitement that each one of those girls feels on recital day.

2. I love what I do for a living. I have said since I was 4 years old that I was going to be a dance teacher when I grew up and I have successfully completed that life goal and I wouldnt trade this last year for anything. As frustrating as it was at times, and as creatively stunted as a felt with a few of my pieces, all of it seemed worth when after the show on Saturday night, one of my girls looked at me and told me that I made her fall in love with dancing and that she never knew that she could communicate in a way that told such a story. That moment right there. Thats how I know I was born to do this.

3. Growing up is hard. Nic and I have been praying and seeking God about a lot of what's to come in life. We have spent hours talking and laughing and crying and just trying to figure out what makes the most sense for us as a family. Looking at life as something to be enjoyed, not endured but at the same time knowing that we arent kids anymore. We have things that have to be done and we have bills that have to be payed and there is just nothing that we can do about that. Life is an adventure to say the least, but I wouldnt want to take this adventure with anyone else.

4. Death always stings. This past week our family lost one of our dearest friends to suicide. This was a friend that my mom grew up with. He married my mom's very best childhood friend. She was the matron of honor in their wedding. We went to the church that they started for quite a bit of my childhood. My brother has preached at their church. Jess has lead worship there. We loved these people with everything that we had, and yet we never realized that the weight of life was just too much for him to handle. And it was so humbling to hear what had happened, because you never expect the ones that seem so strong to fall. You never expect the ones that seem so tall, to become so small. You never expect that news. And honestly when my dad called to to tell me, I hung up the phone and I had a good long cry. I felt angry. Angry that life can be so freaking cruel sometimes. Angry that the choice was made to go. That God didnt call him home. I felt broken, because I could hear the brokenness in my mom's voice when I called her. Broken because of something that shouldnt have ever happened. I felt selfish. Selfish that I hadn't been seeking God enough to know that he needed help. Selfish that my family didnt see it. That we didnt realize what was going on. I felt sad. For his family. For his wife. For his children and grandchildren. Sad for his congregation. No matter what way you look at it. No matter who it is. Death always stings when you dont see it coming. Hearing the word death after a person's name always feels like you got the wind knocked out of you. I know its a part of life, but its just one of those parts that hurts.

5. I love my husband more than I thought possible. Nic is currently in California with the Marine Corps for his Annual Training. He left last Wednesday and will be back next Tuesday. And as weird as it seems, we have not spent a night apart since we got married, and honestly, I liked it that way. I am missing him more than I ever thought I could miss someone. And the part of it that I am having a hard time wrapping my head around is that I am currently snuggled into my bed in my childhood bedroom spending these 2 weeks with my family. A place that I am constantly missing when I am in Virginia Beach. The people that I love so much are all around me, yet I am constantly catching myself counting down the days until I get to see my Nicolas again. I have been glued to my cell phone just waiting to hear from him. Its a strange feeling. Being home, but wanting to be with Nic. Being with Nic but wanting to be home. Its a strange feeling, but its all a part of finding a new normal for myself. Settling into a life and a job, but at the same time knowing that in a year, all of that will change again. Knowing that life is nothing more than string of subtle changes. No two days will ever be the same. You are constantly changing. Life is constantly moving. And it never slows down. But even in the midst of the change, I know that two things will always remain constant... my Jesus, and that the love that Nic and I share will never grow cold. We truly have something special and I only pray that every person that I know and love will experience what we have someday. It is the most incredible feeling in the world.

So that is the latest happenings in the Morris house. We are forever changing. Life is never standing still. But we are writing one heck of a story.

I leave you with a picture of the cutest bumble bees known to man and my amazing family.

Also I got an Iron Man lunch box. I am gunna be the coolest kid ever taking my dinner to work this summer. You know you're jealous. Come on. Admit it. 

I hope you have enjoyed this Morris Moment.

Until next time...

Beautiful Moments

Today I sat down to check my emails, and to creep Facebook, and I didn't expect anything really out of the ordinary to happen. But then it did...

I watched this video.

And in 22 short minutes, something extraordinary happened.

This video tells the story of a 17 year old boy who was diagnosed with terminal cancer. But instead of falling apart and letting the reality of life kill him, he let that same reality cause him to live, and to live every single day to the fullest. He inspired everyone around him to live life for every moment. To cherish the time you have while you have it. To be who it is that you were meant to be now, not somewhere down the line.

I want that to be my story. I want people to see the beauty in life just by spending time with our family. I want to enjoy every moment that I am given.

Life has been particularly stressful the last few months. Figuring out finances and life and what is happening next, and when life feels like its moving so fast that you dont have time to stop and think let alone look around, its so easy to miss moments. Moments that are creating you. Moments that are so beautiful that it would be a shame to miss them. And so much of life lately has been made up of beautiful moments. Moments that are defining who it is that we are becoming. Decisions that are forming that future of the Morris family. And I dont want to miss those. I want to cherish each beautiful moment that I live, because those moments can be stolen, before we even realize they are gone.

Last week I came home from work and Nic had prepared an evening in honor of me. He made me my favorite snacks, he gave me a massage. We watched a movie that I picked. We laughed and talked and laughed some more. That was a moment. A truly beautiful moment. This past saturday at Recital Rehearsal for work, one of my three year olds came running up to me at the end of their hour and hugged my leg and said "Bye Miss Destiny. I love you!" Another little girl was sitting next me a little later in the evening and she slowly leaned over and rested her head on my arm and just stayed there. Those. Those were beautiful moments. Moments that I cherish. And I never want to miss moments like that.

So today I experience something extraordinary. I learned what it means to live. What it means to enjoy your life. What is means to love. I learned that life is what you make it. And if you dont make it something, it ends up being nothing. Life is a beautiful and I never want to miss the life that I have the opportunity to live. Because life is a truly beautiful thing.

"Life is really just beautiful moments, one right after the other." ~Zach Sobiech

Until next time...

So today I was thinking...

So today I was thinking about how awesome my wedding was. My mom and I really did plan quite a bash. I was watching the video today, because Im missing my pap something terrible and seeing him alive and healthy walking down the aisle somehow makes me feel like he is still here, and every time I see that video I remember how good my life is and how blessed I really am. Nic means more to me than I thought possible, I have an amazing family and I married into a family just as amazing, and I live a beautiful life.

So since this blog is my way of remembering things as they happen and not wanting to miss anything, here's our wedding montage. So that a 20 years from now when my kids are reading my blog and thinking about how over emotional and awkward I was, they can watch this video and see where they started from. They can see the love that their dad and I share for each other and always rest in the fact that home will be a safe place for them.

Nic and Destiny's Wedding

Until next time...

Life as we know it...

So again, it has been far too long since I have updated the world on the latest happenings in the Morris house. The last 3 months have been quite insane for us. With my grandfather passing away in January, being in a wedding the following week, and the passing of Nic's grandmother this past month, things have been beyond crazy for us. So much travel, so many miles on our car, and so many lengthy conversations that I wouldn't trade for anything.

Nic and I had a lot of really good conversations in the 40+ hours we have spent in the car the last few months. We talked about life, where we have been, but most importantly where we are going. We talked about his dreams to pursue school and what that looks like. We talked about where we are heading once he is done with the military. We talked about what our family will begin to look like in the next few years and what proximity we want to be to both sides. We talked about life and love and Jesus. We talked about what he wants for us in ministry in the years to come. We talked about my work and his work and what we are wanting out of both. We talked about everything that life has to offer us right now. Being trapped in a moving box for that long is tiring and I tend to get a little stir crazy, but I wouldn't have wanted to be trapped in a box with anyone else.

All of the events that have occurred over the last few months have significantly changed life as we know it. Nothing about us is the same. Both of our families are different, our family is different. Parts of our identity have been laid to rest and thats hard for anyone to swallow. It changes you. It changes who you thought you were into who you now have to be. But the sweet part of this is the memories. This was my first Easter without my pap and as we all sat together in our apartment this weekend we talked about how different things felt. But there is also an excitement in that. Being able to form new traditions. Having the opportunity to build what life looks like now from the ground up. Melding families together, throwing around the idea of being in the same place at the same time and bringing to life something so new and foreign to us. But its a really cool balance. Something that we know is now a part of us. Something that we both cherish.

So for those of you who have been wondering what is going on in the Morris house, thats it. Learning what family looks like now. Rebuilding who we are from the ground up and making two families one. We are going to Cirque du soliel next weekend with the Arends which will be one of the highlights of my life. And we are heading to PA for a wedding the following weekend, then begins the joy of Saturday rehearsals for my June recital for work. And who knows after that. Currently searching for a full time job to bring in some extra money. So that search is on. But God has it all under control. The hard part is resting in that. Easier said than done, but God holds the bigger picture. Im looking forward to seeing all that he has for us. The Morris Family has big things in store. I just know it.

oh... and we got a fish. His name is Herman. Herman Melville Morris to be exact...




Until next time....

The laws of physics.

So for those of you who have never had the opportunity to get to know my husband, you may not know that he is one of the most intelligent people you will ever meet. The way that his brain works truly is a mystery to me. His ability to pick things apart and figure out how they work, his constant need to know why something is the way that it is, the way his mind never stops moving. No matter the topic. Science, history, even just life in general. He has to know why. Now at times, its frustrating, because Im not as smart as him. I don't see life in the same bizarre way that he does. And I don't always have the ability to figure out why something is the way that it is. Or why something is fair when it makes no logical sense that it should be. Like why my pap had to die. Or why life just doesnt seem to go my way. Or why my job is frustrating. Or why people leave without giving a reason. Or how things are just so perfect sometimes that you are sad that that moment will end, because you know it will never be that perfect again.

But even though I may not have the mind to see life the way he does, I have learned something so valuable from my husband's way of thinking. Everything has a science to it. And today as I was sitting on the couch, recovering from whatever sickness it is that my tutu wearing rugrats gave me this time, I was thinking about life. I have always been quite the nerd. I love learning and reading and gaining knowledge. But when I was in high school, I never realized that what I was learning applied so much to my life. We live in this ever changing world. It never slows down or takes a break or stops long enough to let us catch our breath. But within that world that spins so quickly and so violently, there are constants that never change. We never know what the day to day will hold. We never know what to expect, because life isn't predictable. But those constants, they hold us together. Family holds us together. Our friends hold us together. The ones that aren't afraid to remind us that there really is no such thing as normal. The ones that have stuck by you through all of life's ups and downs. The ones that have proven that they want to be there. Our constants. And just like Einstein's Theory of Relativity, the speed of light is constant. No matter what is happening around it. No matter how violent the force, it remains constant. And the bright spots in our lives, they are our constants. They get us from one day to the next. They are the ones that keep us together. And in life, it seems that we have traveled light years. We have gone through so much change and evolution in who we are as people, as families, as mere minutes in this huge vast universe, but at the end of the day, when I look back on where I have been and where I am going next, I am truly thankful for the constants in my life. I don't know who I would be without them.

And more than that, today I am thankful for a husband who thinks differently than most. One who's willing to challenge me, and to be my strongest constant in the midst of the chaos. Here's to the love of my life.

Until next time...

Just something to think about...

It speaks for itself... 

Back from the silence...

So its been a quiet month on the blog front. Im sorry to my faithful readers, and to myself for not documenting more. But regardless, I'm here now. And I am writing.

This month I lost one of my heros. On Saturday, January 19th, my grandpa passed away. To say that this was the hardest experience of my life is an understatement. This was a week in my life that still feels like a dream. To see my family that broken, still feels like a really bad dream. But as hard as that week was, honestly moving forward is scarier. Everything about my family is about to change. The way we do holidays. Going home for visits. Everything is changing. Faster than I ever thought it possible. It all changed in an instant. Its funny that I never realized that Pap was kind of the glue that held us all together. He made all of us stronger just be being him. Just by his existence in our lives. His support and love helped to make me who I am today and for that I will always be grateful. But I miss him. I miss him so much it hurts. I guess thats how life is sometimes... it dishes you crap you dont always want to deal with. But you have to take it. You have to keep moving forward. No matter how much it hurts.

 Aside from that, I am trying to just move forward with my life. To learn as much as possible. To be the best wife I can be. As strange as it sounds, Nic and I are better friends than we ever were. We are working at being the best we can as we move forward in our marriage. We want everything that we do to be in center of God's will. So we are praying. And trusting that God is ordering our steps as to where we are heading next.

Next Im working on a piece for Regent's Fight Night, which I am really excited about. Its nice to be able to stretch myself and work new elements of my artistic ability.

So thats the latest. And its a long road ahead... but it'll get easier. I know it will. Ive got a beautiful husband. An amazing family. And a loving home.  I truly do live a beautiful life.

Until next time...